Restless

I have too many desires I know,
But if that changed I would lose the good self,
Because I am made too much for the future,
Too fragile for the stakes which I am risking,
For something neither possible nor practical,
Mixed with fire and a shade of the amber glass,
But still it is not complete.
The whole scene drained without that essential componant,
The one who does to your heart what no scientist can accept,
And still deny the existance of God.
And yes this is too much to ask,
This is not my chosen blessing,
But still I desire,
And so still I am restless.