8.12.2007

Mars Teaser

**PRELIMINARY DRAFT**

A Divine April Fools


On April 1 at 22:13, the Orange Air Force base in Tuscaloosa detected nothing abnormal on the surface of the planet mars. A full sixty seconds later the planet's red, coarse wrapping was dotted with 16,242,070 white beings, all of about the same height of the earth equivalent to 5 feet and 9 inches. The researchers at the Orange Air Force did not at first detect all 16 or so million creatures. They did not have the appropriate ranged telescopes for such a discovery. What they did notice was the pale patch that now lay over a portion of the upper hemisphere, created by the creatures close relation to one another. The researches at the Orange Air Force base at first took this to be a mass of water newly exposed and promptly frozen. A full eighteen minutes passed on the planet earth before it was discovered that the ice was in fact alive. It was still not known that the life was sentient, but rather obvious as the patch began to move and spread. It would be 48 hours before the professional world would admit that an exceptionally large number of, for lack of a better word at the time, people now existed on the planet mars. They made this distinction very clear. Immediately plans were made to investigate closer and a number of astronauts who before had no launch expectation date were trained and prepped for the mission. They were to orbit the planet first, and use special instruments to discover just exactly what the people were doing. Upon relaying this back to earth, the astronauts would be advised either to, if they showed any signs of hostility, return home or else proceed to land a safe distance away from the borders the people had spread to. The radio communications would be aired live on both Fox News and CNN. The launch date was set for April 30th.

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